and also what I'm not

Today I learned that I should have known this was a grueling life.

I learned that sometimes things work and sometimes they don’t, but you have to try them in order to be considered a visionary.

I learned that one should avoid the “formulaic cage is Disney pastiche”.

I learned that Romeo is a horndog because he ends up in the midst of a love story that sparks when he never even sees the girl’s face. (I already knew this, actually. But this is one of my favorite lessons to have reiterated.)

I learned that you can take any good idea and do it badly. Likewise, I learned that “you can be a bloody genius and still be an actor in a cupboard”.

I learned that the metaphysical implications of “oooooooo” are infinite.

I learned that you shouldn’t sit in a drink.

And I learned that the correct way to order a drink is as follows: “Vodka on the rocks. No umbrella.” First time the worth of grad school has remotely approached its price tag.